From as346@chebucto.ns.ca Fri Jan 17 21:06:46 1997
I am totally amazed at the volume of response I am getting for this, and I
thank you all profusely, and I will not whine anymore! *crossing fingers*
The second one sucked, and I apologize for that, but I can write 'n' post
these within an hour somit's no big deal.

Disclaimer:Agents Scully, Mulder and Pendrell belong to Fox, 1013 and CC.
           I'll start making money when Chris leaves after Season 5.

Rating:PG
       Humour
       Angst

Spoliers:None

Dedication:To my ever eloquent e-pal, CiCi Lean, who will never beat me
           with her hook comments, simply for the fact that I am better. ;-)
           To you, may you enjoy this story, Geekgirl!  Mwa ha ha...
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			The C-Files:Freaky Mulder
			     by Tara Thorne

   "But *why* do we have to pick him up?"

   Dana Scully shot a withering look at her incessantly whining partner.

   "Because," she said slowly, "he has no car."

   Mulder shrugged as if a car was an unnecessary means of transportation.

   "He could have taken the bus," he declared.

   "Mulder," Scully began evenly, "look at where we are.  No bus nor taxi
would ever find its way out here."

   Mulder glanced around at the landscape surrounding them.  They were just
outside of Washington, but it seemed as though they were a world away.  Trees
everywhere.  Mulder half expected some hairy beast to jump out of the woods
and in front of the car at any second.  But of course, he was always 
expecting *that*.

   "Besides," Scully added, "carpooling is good for the environment."

   Mulder just grunted as he pulled into the driveway of a small bungalow,
house #1121.  He resisted the urge to laugh as he saw the flowerbeds lining
the walkway (in full bloom), and the perfectly pruned bushes which ran the
perimeter of the lawn.  Scully looked surprised as well but said nothing.

   "Did we, perchance, hit a white picket fence on the way in?" Mulder asked,
quite seriously.

   Scully just gave him a Look.

   "Because I could've sworn..." he trailed off as he turned to look back at
the entrance.  He turned back to the front and shrugged dismissively.

   Scully reached over and bopped the horn twice.

   Again, Mulder resisted the urge to laugh as Brian Pendrell came stumbling
out his front door.

   "Y'know," he said, leaning towards Scully conversationally, "he probably
just used this as an excuse to call you."

   "Shut up, Mulder, and give the guy a break," she retorted.

   Mulder just laughed as Pendrell climbed into the back.  "Morning, Agent
Pendrell," he chuckled.

   "Agent Mulder," Pendrell acknowledged.

   Scully turned and smiled.  "Morning."

   Pendrell swallowed hard, his features tightening nervously.  "Agent 
Scully," he squeaked by way of greeting.

   On their way back into the city, all was quite until Scully heard Mulder
suck in a breath.  She prepared herself, silently, for the inevitable.

   "Know what song I like?" Mulder asked them both.

   Pendrell shrugged, staring at the back of Scully's head, which she, in
turn, shook from side to side in reply.

   "Have You Ever Needed Someone So Bad by, Def Leppard," Mulder continued.
With an evil smirk, he glanced at his fellow Agent.  "Know that one, Agent
Pendrell?"

   Scully also glanced back to see his response, and the slight man tensed
up and shook his head violently.

   "N-no, Agent Mulder, I don't believe I've heard it," he stuttered.

   Mulder nodded and shrugged.  "Good song."

   Scully eyed him speculatively, but he seemed focused on driving.  She
didn't like the way he was obviously torturing Pendrell, but supposed it
wasn't anything all *that* serious.

   Behind her, Pendrell noticed there was a tag sticking out from under 
Scully's collar, most likely from one of those never-seen tight t-shirts she
wore under her jackets.  His fingers trembled as he wondered if it would be
unprofessional to tuck it in for her.

   Mulder noticed that Pendrell was staring at Scully, nothing new, but it
seemed more direct.  An evil grin split his features when he saw the tag
sticking out of his partner's jacket.

   It was entertainment enough to watch Pendrell jerk around in the backseat,
reaching towards her and then yanking his hand back whenever she moved her
head.  But his plan would be SO much more fun, and Scully wouldn't even get
mad at him, because she would have *no* clue.

   Mulder leaned over so his head was inches away from hers.  Sliding his
hand seductively (although she couldn't see it) across the top of the seat,
he said lowly, "You've got a tag sticking out."

   As Pendrell made strangling noises behind them, Mulder made a show of
pushing the tag back down below her collar, his fingers lightly, 
"accidentally" brushing across the bcak of her neck.

   To Scully, it was a favor.

   To Mulder, it was a joke.

   To Pendrell, gullible, infatuated Pendrell, it was hell.

   Scully smiled her thanks as they oulled into the parking lot of the J.
Edgar Hoover parking lot.

   The car had barely stopped when Pendrell jumped out, mumbled his thanks,
and raced off in the direction of his office.

   Scully stared after him, confused.

   Her look quickly turned suspicious as her partner doubled over in 
laughter.

   Pendrell could hear him.

   As soon as he got in, he called the mechanic.


  ---END---

Okay, that one kinda sucked too, but it was really a personal shot at all you
UberUrkel lovers, especially my unworthy opponent CiCi.

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as346@chebucto.ns.ca

I love Ratboy!
(I kid becase I love...)

Don't take my sanity...